Hey, everybody! Antoni here, and I want to thank everybody who has greeted my on my twenty-eighth birthday. I am very grateful for all the love, the support, the acclaim, and the overall positivity I have been receiving, even in this really difficult time of the Coronavirus pandemic.
Being at this stage in life as well as being under lockdown during and after the Lenten season has made me acknowledge a host of home truths, realizations, and hopes and goals for my own personal future not only in my life as a university student but also my career as an online reviewer specializing in music and entertainment, artist, actor, voice actor, and singer.
For those of you not in the know, I have been on an Odyssey-like battle with my own weight for many years. There were times I was on the big side and there were times I was kind of slim, but nevertheless, I was still quite fat, though I cannot really remember the precise numbers. Essentially, I always wanted to end up a whole lot skinnier, which this thought commenced when I was a young teenager influenced by a lot of goth fashion, anime characters, and fashion models.
I could still remember being at my slimmest when I was in my high school years because of the abundant activities that were done as well as being part of the cheer-dancing team for all four years. Even during that period, I tried everything I could to try to be slimmer through slimming teas and trying to not think about food too much, which resulted in me getting a lot of compliments from relatives about how I looked.
Unfortunately, after four years of high school and when I got myself into film school, I ended up ballooning somewhere between 250 to 256 pounds (113.4 kilograms to 116.12 kilograms or 17 stone, 12 pounds to 18 stone, 4 pounds). Ergo, my repertoire might have been expanding, but so did my waistline, and I mostly attributed it to mindless comfort-eating even though I knew which foods were good for me, a fair amount of drinking to boot, and having big portions while I was still living in Cebu, Philippines.
By the time I moved to Berlin, my quality of life changed, in spite of being surrounded by restaurants and takeaways, and because I got myself into many physical activities in my acting schools. Despite being mobile and being at a slightly more manageable weight than I am now, there were times I did not know when to stop eating, and I was in denial about my weight and the health implications that came along with it.
Even after I graduated from acting school and started doing A-Levels, my weight was constantly see-sawing, though I was still on the big side, and I had occasions where my takeaway habit was getting the best of me. I still knew what I was eating and I was still thinking that I was still on the 90-kilogram or 198-pound line. However, those several moments of grazing after going through the introductory phase of my A-Levels made me pile on the pounds, as I could remember coming back from my summer break in 2017 heavier than I was. It was also a similar story when I came back from my Christmas break in Helsinki, Finland heavier than what I thought I was.
Skipping to one year and several months after I rang the New Year in Helsinki and to my A-Levels graduation, I may have been happy that I ended up getting a good average of 1,8, but the anxiety of wanting to be accepted by any of the universities here in Berlin got to me to the point where I turned to very palatable food for comfort ranging from the leftover food in the fridge and generally in the house to burgers to steaks to cookie dough and seriously piled on the pounds.
The moment where I took more responsibility of my own weight was back in late August of 2019 where I weighed 241.63 pounds (109.6 kilograms or 17 stone, 3.63 pounds). I knew I could no longer be in denial about my own weight, especially considering how much I ended up binge-watching weight-loss shows such as Fat Families, Supersize vs Superskinny, It’s Your Fault I’m Fat, Secret Eaters, a whole bevy of extreme weight-loss documentaries, and even Bennett the Sage’s weight loss video on YouTube.
Before I started university between early September to early October, I was traveling to Paris, Bordeaux, and Dresden not only to tune in to the operas and make my signature vlog-style online reviews on YouTube but also to do a lot of walking to the various sites and even to and from the chosen destinations be they opera house or my hotel. This got to the point where I embraced the fact that I can walk from Place A to Place B mostly without the help of public transportation and it ended up being a lifestyle change for me. Aside from that, my view on food has changed to the point where I did my best to stop caring about takeaways and embrace a diet rich in fish, chicken, vegetables, and fruit.
Because of that lifestyle change I ended up losing 24.25 pounds (11 kilograms or 1 stone, 10.25 pounds) in the span of three months back in 2019, which spurred me on to keep it up more often, thus making me 217.38 pounds (98.6 kilograms or 15 stone, 7.38 pounds).
Even when I ended up back at 223.77 pounds (101.5 kilograms or 15 stone, 13.77 pounds) after my Christmas and New Year’s break in Tallinn, Estonia, I did not end up going back to what I was back in late August 2019. Moreover, I became more iron-clad in my resolve to lose a whole lot more weight and be in control of what I eat.
After eight months of going through Hell and back with my own weight, I am rather proud to declare that I am now 205.47 pounds (93.2 kilograms or 14 stone, 9.47 pounds), meaning that I have lost 36.16 pounds (16.4 kilograms or 2 stone, 8.16 pounds). While that might sound like quite the weight loss, I still have a very long way to go, considering that I stand 5 feet, 6.5 inches (169 centimeters) tall and that I would have to be between 157.41 and 125.88 pounds (71.4 and 57.1 kilograms or 11 stone, 3.41 pounds and 8 stone, 13.88 pounds) to be considered wholly healthy.
I know how much weight loss is a constant numbers game and it requires dogged persistence to ensure that health, discipline, and longevity are at the pinnacle of my priorities. The penny has dropped in terms of how much I need to change and I need to start changing from within. I want to see my nieces and nephews grow. I want to continue being more mobile no matter where I am. I want to be forever independent. Finally, I do not ever want to see myself being in a room surrounded by four walls ending up as a blob because that is my idea of Hell.
In conclusion, I addressed the problems I had with mindless comfort eating and became fully conscientious of what I should and should not eat. I have dropped the need of takeaways because I no longer need them and I can find joy in ensuring that as long as I keep up the weight loss, I can guarantee myself a constant boost in self-esteem, confidence, and a chance at a much healthier, longer life.
I thank you for taking the time to read this and thank you once again for bringing a lot of purpose in my current life as a 28-year-old. Take care and stay safe, everybody.
